Pushing the Buttons

A recurring thought or question has been running through my mind the last couple of days. Who is really in control of my life? Me or God?

God is supposed to be the one pushing the buttons in my world. How many times do we allow circumstances to control us and we grab the control out of God's hands? Even if the circumstances in life are hurtful, God is still to be in control.

This is a lesson I have learned the hard way in the last couple of months. Some very hurtful and stressful things have come my way in the previous months. I found myself taking the control and pushing the buttons. The buttons I was pushing was anger and bitterness. This anger and bitterness caused me to become distant and to hurt some very dear friends. Now I am paying the price after choosing to push my own buttons.


This last week, specifically Thursday night or should I say Friday morning (4:30 a.m. to be exact) I had an epiphany of sorts. I woke and found myself praying. God woke me up so that we could talk. The anger and bitterness weren't hurting the people I thought should be hurt. They were hurting only me. He asked me if I was ready to release all of that and to allow Him to have control of me again. I am happy to say that I gave all of that and all of me (once again) to God!

I woke up Friday a changed person. It was almost like someone had given me wings. I had forgiveness from God for everything!! What more could a person ask for?